Margarita Passos is a businesswoman from Baeza who has lived in the United States for decades. Despite his success in the professional field, he became depressed and suffered from generalized anxiety disorder, but he recovered. After experiencing this difficult emotional situation, he says his goal is to support others to do the same.
He tells part of his story in his book I can, you can!which is also a guide to techniques for people to control their emotional health. There she says that she was a victim of herself and experienced obsessive compulsions, claustrophobia, panic attacks and many other feelings that literally paralyzed her. He says that his childhood experiences and his mind were what did not allow him to leave there; Until he decided to take a new direction.
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Along with Shakira, Karol G and Daniela Alvarez, Margarita Passos was included in the list of the 25 most powerful women in the world, according to the magazine. the people in Spanish. On the weekend of April 20, she was at the Bogota Book Fair and explained to Infobae Colombia what are the five keys that all people need to become strong:
- Have a good talk with yourself; “At the end of the day, you're the one you talk to the most.”
- Focus on what you can control: Look at what you can change about your behavior.
- Empathy: “When someone is difficult, don't get upset. Look at it with sympathy, but don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket.
- The Power of Why: “If you see a mother who needs to save ten million pesos, nothing stops that woman because she has a reason.” The key is to have a motive that touches the heart.
- “You are a miracle”: Margarita reflects that all people have a purpose in life. “This is not necessarily the goal of Mother Teresa of Calcutta, but yours is unique.”
For me, this means recognizing the inner strength we all possess and how to use it in our lives. Strength lies in our ability to control our inner narrative and not allow outside opinions to define us. Sometimes we give up this power and allow outside criticism to become negative voices within us.
Some people may associate power with external success or public influence, while I see it as a process of personal growth. Shakira shared that they used to tell her that she sings like a goat. Imagine if she let that affect her? They told Walt Disney that he had no imagination. What would have happened if Walt Disney had replied, “I'm not good for this”? Mickey Mouse was dead. I believe that being strong means taking control.
Of course, the ideal solution is to free yourself from toxic relationships, but sometimes we get trapped in complicated situations. Imagine that you depend on your job and really enjoy it, but you have a partner who constantly shows bitterness.
The truth is that people who hurt often hurt others. However, ultimately, this person will no longer have control over you if you learn how to manage your mind. For me, the mind is a machine that creates meaning. I can see my partner as someone who makes my life miserable or I can interpret him as someone who may be suffering.
For example, I can mention the book Man's search for meaning By Viktor Frankl, A Jewish psychiatrist who survived the Holocaust. Frankl claimed that although the Nazis might deprive him of everything, they could not deprive him of his ability to choose what he thought.
The message to colleagues of people facing mental health issues is to be very empathetic. I thank God for my husband who has always supported me unconditionally. Even though I think deep down he believed there was nothing wrong with me, he never told me he didn't believe me. Some friends suggested that she was just seeking attention or that she had no reason to be depressed. This reflects a lack of understanding of mental health.
My advice is to seek professional help, preferably a recommended psychologist. The psychiatrist was the first to diagnose me with generalized anxiety disorder, which was a huge relief to me. Since then, I have understood the importance of proper treatment. I would never recommend reading my book and that's it. However, he also highlighted the importance of self-care, such as practicing breathing, exercising, eating well, and seeking out activities that nourish us mentally.
We must end the taboo surrounding mental health. Just as we go to a gastroenterologist if we have stomach problems, we should also seek professional help if we feel that a black cloud is accompanying us in life. Remember that only you know what you feel.
When we include emotional intelligence in a course or event, we notice that 90% of registrants are women. But when we talk about mental strength, attendance is almost equal between men and women. Stereotypes such as “men don't cry” make it difficult for men to show weakness. Personally, I feel more compassion for men, because I know they have a hard time being vulnerable.
Sometimes, when a man shows himself weak in front of his friends, he can receive insensitive reactions, and they say: “Listen to this.” Therefore, it is important that they are not afraid to ask for help. When we cover topics of mental toughness, we also address mental reprogramming and emotional intelligence, which appeals to a more diverse audience. These issues are universal and affect everyone, regardless of gender.
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